Peace of Mind

On a Monday I had a date with a wonderful woman. We laughed, we talked, we shared a flashlight, a beer and dinner. I had peace of mind knowing that someone enjoyed my company.

On a Tuesday I threw a Frisbee for the dog. She chased and played and wagged her tail. She sat at my feet and wanted a pat. I had peace of mind just having a companion.

On a Wednesday I got emails from my children. They are balancing busy lives but still have time to appreciate the awe and wonder around them. I had peace of mind knowing that we have raised children that could have peace of mind.

On a Thursday I got a journal from my nephew. He is a teen waiting to be an adult. He has fears, hopes and dreams. I had peace of mind knowing that being a teen hasn’t changed.

On a Friday evening I sat with my wife snuggled on a love seat watching Numbers. I had peace of mind knowing that all was right and I was loved.

On a Saturday morning I sat in church with 20 other people, knowing that the basics haven’t changed; Ask for forgiveness, Listen to the Gospel and Receive the Eucharist. I had “Peace of Mind” knowing that religion doesn’t have to be complicated.

On Sunday morning I shoveled snow. It was quiet, I clearly knew the task at hand and was fully capable of completing it. It was nice to have the mental rest from the uncertainty that clutters most days. I had “Peace of Mind”

To Be or Not to Be Married, That is the Question.

Odd dinner conversation, but even odder trying to imagine something that I have never really experienced as an adult.

Being over 50, I am not sure what life would be like. I see other singles sitting alone in church, shopping in the store and the movies. They must have friends and a life but what would it be like. Do they have kids and extended families? What if I never got married? My wife claims I would be a hermit on a lake with a fishing boat. She may be right.

I think either way I would adapt, that is what people are designed to do.

Would I get married again if she was gone. Probably not. There are some days that being a Hermit sounds very appealing.

Tiger Woods

Friday February 19, 2010 at 11am the world stopped to watch a man talk about his infidelities on national TV. I was one of those people.

Martin Luther King was a womanizing adulterer, as was Bill Clinton and John F. Kennedy. Wilt Chamberline wrote a book about the 10,000 women he slept with, so Tiger Woods is in good company. These men will probably not go down in history as one of the greatest husbands of all time, but they will be remembered for what they were great at.

So why do we care or expect more? For myself, I am hopeful that someone can have and do it all. Unfortunately history regularly shows us that such a person doesn’t exist. Not even Jesus tried to juggle the whole Family-Career thing. He left the earth early in life and even though he could walk on water he chose not to deal with a wife and family. So should we conclude that 3 years of public life and out should be the optimum plan. Maybe we should ask John Edwards.

I found it sad that speculation was used to drive controversy to create news. There are enough real conflicts around that we don’t need contrived ones. I also think that the women who believed that they had something special to make Tiger leave his wife and family should use their money he gave them to get help themselves. They must be delusional.

I watched at 11am to see how someone with such a large hole to climb out of takes the first step. It was good to hear that he was getting help and not doing it alone, but he has shown in the past he is willing to get help from coaches in golf and experts in business. I will continue to watch and see how this unfolds. People tend to grow to like underdogs and Tiger is quickly becoming one. Hopefully more people will root for him and his family.

"Mutts Rule" and "Breeders Kill Shelter Dogs' Chances"

I didn’t think I had anything to write about today until I read this on line. "Mutts Rule" and "Breeders Kill Shelter Dogs' Chances". This was part of an interruption to the Westminster Dog show yesterday by 2 members of PETA.

Let me start by saying that I think there are way too many dogs in the world and I don’t have a problem with dogs in shelters being put down. I am also ok with aggressive dogs being put down. I actually think they should be used for food to help feed the people who are starving. Seems like a perfect supply and demand solution.

My issue with PETA’s demonstration has to do with the poor selection of the protest subject. If that is the best they could come up with they should close up and move on to a new cause. I could understand if they had an issue with the methods and protocol the Kennel Clubs use in breeding and possible health defects that are occurring in some breeds, or if they objected to the new Designer Dogs. But their topic had little relevance and showed they have not adequately analyzed or defined the problem they hoped to solve.

Their statement indicates that if Kennel Club members stopped breeding pure bred dogs, people would adopt the shelter dogs. It is like saying people who are capable of supplying a child’s physical, emotional and spiritual needs should be sterilized and forced to adopt. This may also solve a supply and demand issue but probably wouldn’t do much for the evolution of the human race.

In both cases the problem needs to be addressed rather than finding an outlet for the error.

Fiddler on the Roof

I was fortunate enough to receive tickets to see Fiddler on the Roof as a present. Not that I haven’t seen it before. I have the movie on VHS, the soundtrack on my Ipod and have seen the play multiple times as presented by local theatre groups.

The story has many interpretations, but for me it is a reminder of how change can significantly conflict with what I hold as fundamental beliefs. How hard it is to weigh the changes and determine which are needed for the good and which are not. How what I wanted as change when I was young doesn’t seem so important now. At one time I saw tradition as a problem but now I am a part of the tradition and maybe part of the problem. I can better see what my father saw, what my grandfather saw and how it may have impacted their decisions. How they dealt with the conflict between change and tradition. How they bent, trying to avoid going over the breaking point. And maybe they did go over their breaking point and had to come back or were unable to.

I most strongly relate to the father’s struggle to reconcile what he believes with his love for his family and wanting them to be happy. The story gives a glimpse into the struggles that go on within him. Thoughts he can’t share openly, since it would compromise his position as head of the household, yet deserves contemplation. He turns to God for help and we get to hear his conversations between himself and God. Although God doesn’t answer, he continues to talk, he bends and continues on.

There is no resolution at the end of the story, just another major change to be dealt with and adapted to.

A Broken Heart

As I get older and ponder life, I contemplate how much longer my heart will continue to tick and has the loss of love (a broken heart) added to or subtracted from the number of ticks my heart has left in it

A broken heart is a devastating sorrow resulting from the unexpected loss of Love. Fortunately most broken hearts mend but do they take a toll on the heart. I think all my broken hearts have mended but have they taken a toll or made my heart stronger.

Having a broken heart is one of life’s memorable experiences and may only occur a few times. I can only remember three times that I would consider having a truly broken heart.

Surprisingly there are instances where a broken heart has been fatal. These instances were associated with the sudden loss of Security Love. Security Love being the love that exists at unique times in our lives that we need to survive. It is that feeling of being cared for and nurtured, supported in midair by someone else. If that support is taken away suddenly, we enter free fall. It is a loss that I have felt and fortunately survived due to loving support of others.

Friendship Love is a love between yourself and someone that is totally honest, open and comfortable. This love is a rare bond with a few people. A heart break from the loss of Friendship Love seldom fully heals since the rareness of finding someone will always leave a bit of a crack. I have never experience this loss.

Romantic Love is often experienced many times in a life time. It is the go weak in knees, butterflies in the stomach love. It can either be falling in love with the idea of love and wears off after a while (which is why it is the easiest to mend), or it may lead to Unconditional Love which is sincere love that lasts forever. I have been fortunate to experience romantic love but also to have felt heart break. It must have been worth it.

One of my favorite Movies of Love is the Wizard of OZ.
It teaches of Love:
“A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others.”
It teaches of the Pitfalls:
“As for you, my galvanized friend, you want a heart. You don't know how lucky you are not to have one. Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.”
It teaches of Heart Break
“Goodbye, Tin man. Oh, don't cry! You'll rust so dreadfully. Here's your oil can.”
“Now I know I've got a heart, 'cause it's breaking”...

Embrace Love and have some duct tape available just incase your heart needs mending.

A Friend

A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future and accepts you today just the way you are.
Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.
A life- long friend is a rare gift.

Hope you have several.

Snow

Particles of water vapor which when frozen in the upper air fall to earth as soft, white, crystalline flakes.

If you want to relax, take a walk in the woods during a gentle snow fall. The quiet is mystical and the sights beautiful. The snow dampens any noise and provides a unique quietness. The birds, frogs and insects that may be vocal in the summer are quiet in the winter. If you need a place to hear yourself or God speak go to the woods during a snow fall.

For the ultimate in body stress relief, lay yourself down in some deep snow. The snow will conform to your body and not create pressure points. If you have on water repellent clothing, the snow will serve as an insulator and keep you warm. It will provide the feeling of an eternal nap.

Instead of driving in it, shoveling it or complaining about it, embrace it. Share it with a friend.

Snowflakes
by Linda A. Copp

Snowflakes spill from heaven's hand
Lovely and chaste like smooth white sand.
A veil of wonder laced in light
Falling Gently on a winters night.
Graceful beauty raining down
Giving magic to the lifeless ground.
Each snowflake like a falling star
Smiling beauty that's spun afar.
Till earth is dressed in a robe of white
Unspoken poem the hush of night.

Welfare

The primary purpose of welfare is to keep the peace. For hungry, desperate and despairing people are dangerous. So welfare has been used to placate people and take away their initiative.

Unfortunately over generations what has occurred is a new way of life, passed on from generation to generation. Hunting and gathering activities have now been focused on how and where to get hand outs. It is the new skill set of the lower class.

The ability to get social services is an important part of civilized societies. The administration of the services is what allows the service to either be a value to the society or what leads to its eventual down fall.

These services after a short period of time should come with a price, payment through work. The payment made real time with the work. Those on welfare would do community work, possibly cleaning schools, tending community gardens, cleaning and caring for parks. Children could be rewarded with morning breakfast at school for completion of homework, proper behavior to get lunch. Earning builds self esteem and initiative.

The gap between the haves and have nots is not increasing because of the greed of the rich, but rather the good intentions of the compassionate that are disabling a growing population segment who see welfare as their new way of life.

It is time to give people their self esteem back.

Healthcare

I didn’t think I had anything to write about today. At least until I read about President Obama trying to set up a televised healthcare discussion. It should be interesting to watch, but I would not want to be the moderator for that one.

I do have to say that I am not a President Obama supporter.

Politicians have been trying to improve healthcare through legislation. It is the proverbial “Solving World Hunger” problem. Keep it so big that nothing will ever really be done.

Healthcare is not a legislative problem (defining rules). It is a physical problem that needs to be addressed using standard problem solving methods that begin with problem definition, measurement, analysis, improvement and control.

No progress is made because a definition and measure never get completed. Our leaders want to jump to solution without narrowing and defining the problem. If we want to improve healthcare let’s get the scope narrowed and the specific problem defined and then we can get on with finding the proper solution.

EMail Forwards

This was forwarded to me without the added comments in ( ), which I added. Maybe we should read and discern what is sent to us before passing it along blindly.

Isn't it strange
How a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church, but such a small amount when you go shopping? (If you believe what the million dollar ad campaigns tell us, we can feed a family of 5 for a month on $20. If you believe people who are earning middle income livings doing charitable work. If you believe religions who are building new million dollar churches while people go hungry)

Isn't it strange
How 2 hours seem so long when you're at church, And how short they seem when you're watching a good movie? (In either instance my back side hurts and I find that there are very few new plots, just recycled ideas – 30 minutes for each works for me)

Isn't it strange
That you can't find a word to say when you're praying but..
You have no trouble thinking what to talk about with a friend? (How much do you have to say to people you live with daily-same with God-he already knows it all, so not much to say)

Isn't it strange
How difficult and boring it is to read one chapter of the Bible but
How easy it is to read 100 pages of a popular novel or ZANE GREY book? (How many books do you reread annually and have interest in. It’s the same story and we already know the ending. Maybe it's time to try a new ending to the story and see if something different happens. Let's let him live at Easter instead of crucifying him)

Isn't it strange
How difficult it is to learn a fact about God to share it with others;
But how easy it is to learn, understand, extend and repeat gossip? (Unfortunately there are no “Facts” about God and the information that is available has been around for 2000 years and not new-which means it is not “News” and everyone has already heard it.)

Isn't it strange
How we believe everything that magazines and newspapers say but, we question the words in the Bible? (We would be better off if we questioned both-should only believe 25% of what you hear)

(Just looking at the word changes and interpretation changes in the bible that have occurred in my adult life, I can’t possibly imaging what has happened to the bible over the past 2000 years)

Diversity

Vanity Fair recently released a magazine cover with their projections of who the young female “It” stars of the future will be. The cover showed thin, white females. The lack of ethnic and size diversity has drawn criticism.

It was disappointing that the criticism wasn’t based on an analysis of previous years projections made by Vanity Fair, possibly pointing out stars that Vanity Fair may have overlooked. An objective and fact based approach may have validated the critics claim and gave the claims some leverage to edge Vanity Fair to improve their method of selection.

The Journaliast should do a better job of investigative reporting so what she writes doesn’t come off as just whining.

I think it is time to lead with the data.

What controls your life? Random Occurrence, Natural Consequence, Divine Providence

The answer to this question is most likely the combination of at least two if not all three.

History has shown that many things that at one time were seen as Random Occurrences or Divine Providence can be explained by Natural Consequence.

But as fast as things are explained new unexplainable things occur. Did these things always exist? Is there a constant creation going on? Or is there constant discovery?

For me as an Engineer, I believe Natural Consequences can explain most situations. Unfortunately many of the actions that go into creating a given outcome may be very complex, time separated and not obviously explainable. These situations can be either Random or Divine Providence with no real physical consequence from selecting either category. Both are acts of faith, just relying on different sources. Since I am unable to predictably alter the outcome, choosing the explanation that makes me most comfortable or drives me to a specific desired action makes the most sense.

The selection of Random or Divine may have an impact on my behavior or feelings but not necessarily on the outcome. If I believe Divine in nature I may pray. I may ask why me or thank God it was me. If random I may just let it go and store it in my minds data banks for future reference.

The theory that everything is explainable by Natural Consequence drives people to learning and understanding. If it was truly believed that most things actually occurred randomly or by divine providence it would make people helpless and maybe hopeless. How the understandings of Natural Consequences are revealed is another question.

As I wrote earlier, is it by communication through a brain wave network of those alive and dead? Is it insight from a supreme being? Do we learn and create on our own?

So what drove your life today?
Random Occurrence, Natural Consequence, Divine Providence

When Does Life Begin

Some say “Life Begins” when your children move out and are on their own.

Although that may be true; the question of when life begins is not a new topic. There is an online article that summarizes nicely the historical perspective on When Does Life Begin. I highly recommend the article.

http://8e.devbio.com/article.php?id=162

The answer to the question has been fluid over time and will probably continue to be. I was surprised that even the Catholic Church has had a number of definitions over time, which illustrates that depending on the available scientific information, current social-political state and latest theological interpretations the definition of life will change.

For myself I believe that the definition of life needs to be the same for when life begins and when life ends. For me this is tied to brain activity. So currently, for me life begins in a fetus at ~24 weeks and ends when brain waves cease.

The Downfall of Society

I recently heard that the 2 biggest contributors to the downfall of our current society are mothers going to work and the credit card.

I was fortunate to have a mother who stayed home, Grandparents and Godmother who lived within walking distance. It was reassuring to know that someone was always there when I needed someone. If they weren't there, I may not have even known the difference, since you don't necessarily miss what you never had, unless someone tells you, you don't have it (a topic for another blog). But I am still grateful that my Mom was able and chose to stay home, and think it had a positive impact on my life.

Have working mothers been a contributor to the downfall of the society? I don’t believe it has a straightforward answer. But if I had to set the norm for our society it would be to have one parent stay home when there are children. I believe it would have a positive impact on the children and a positive impact on the work force.

Credit cards have created allot of bad habits and allowed people to loose the direct connection between what they have and what they can afford. "Out of Sight, Out of Mind", at its worst. I do believe that credit cards have been a major contributor to the decline of our current society. Disconnecting responsibility, accountability and the relationship between earning and saving for what you want. The credit card is impersonal as well. We now owe the money to a company rather than a store owner who may have been our neighbor. Leaving the "Company" unpaid has little impact on our self esteem. It is time to take a step toward repairing our society and eliminating a crutch that has had a disabling impact.

Are we all Connected

It is often said we are all connected and dependent upon each other.

What if it was more true then we realize?

As brain cells connect during early development, neural connectivity occurs. The way the cells and connectivity occurs forms the basis of or future information processing. These connectivities’ are biochemical and electrical in nature.

What if through this neural connectivity we are also connected to others, both living and dead? And how each individual’s connectivity occurs allows us more or less connectivity with others.

What if guardian angels are really others who are also part of our connective network?

What if those who have premonitions, ESP, advanced intelligence are just more connected then others?

Are we all a part of a big brain powered internet? We just need to learn how to get online!

Population Control

Since the time when humans figured out how to out live their usefulness the earth has been moving toward over population and has most likely reached it.

But what to do about it.

*If preservation of life is the primary mantra then conception prevention must be the solution. If taken to the extreme then all humans at birth should be made non-reproductive capable and then need to make a consciuos decision to change it for short periods of time.

*If natural population control is the mantra then artifical forms of conception should not be used, people who are on the brink of death should not be saved, people who can not fend for themselves should not be given the basics of life just to have to be given them tomorrow.

WHat do you think?